Improving India - Holistically.

After a great start to the millennium for the country with the GDP even touching 9% in the latter part of the first decade, it has been only one way for India since then – downhill.  Be it the slowing economy, rising fiscal deficits, border tensions with neighbours and the humungous scams that surfaced has put India on the back foot again.  Some of the problems that India faces today were highlighted in an earlier blog (http://bit.ly/NVd2NP) and it received some constructive criticism as well that I can crib about the current condition but not suggest improvements that can develop the country.  It did not take much time to find solutions to some of the problems.  And if a no-brainer like me can think of it, the rulers in the capital (any party that comes to power) are much more intelligent and diplomatic to develop India.

First - coming to the problem of economic turmoil in the country.  The finances of the country are in pretty bad shape.  CAD is rising and has already hit 95% of the budgeted CAD in the first 9 months of the year.  Major reasons are populist schemes like subsidizing kerosene, Food Security Bill which will be a pain for the next government no matter which party comes into power.  Instead of going for such populist schemes the government can manage their supply chains better and avoid leakages.  For example, India has a bumper harvest in almost all seasons of rice and wheat which make up the staple diet of the people.  But the problem is managing them.  This leads to humungous wastage which can be avoided if there are adequate storage facilities.  FDI in FCI would be of great help.  Food Corporation of India (FCI) is one company which can be managed to end the food woes of India.

Next is defence.  No country, especially countries like India which are surrounded by countries like Pakistan on one side and China on the other, can afford to rely on imported weapons to give a fitting reply.  India, even though says that it has started an indigenization drive, imports as much as 55% of the parts used to build missiles like Brahmos.  R&D must be encouraged and investments must be made to make sure that in the coming decade we supply technology required to make defence weapons.

If the foundation is not strong, the building is bound to crumble.  Our education sector is like that base.  If we do not provide quality education, the future is bound to be doomed.  A recent report in the Mint has described India as a country where the percentage of people receiving education has increased but the quality of education has decreased substantially.  Why can’t the government invest in schools instead of bailing out, say Air India or financially supporting banks which are loss making.  A country’s natural resources or PSU undertakings are considered to be a nation’s wealth and need to be run effectively to support the entire industry in times of crisis but if good money is constantly being put to bail out bad money it is not a wise decision.  Some divestment is appropriate.  It is a shame that we do not have a single world class university which we can call to stand out in the top-10.

Inclusive banking is one thing that India still has not been able to achieve.  In spite of an initiative by RBI to open a certain amount of branches to encourage people to avail banking services, it has not achieved its aim.  More than 50% rural bank accounts are dormant.  Also none of the Indian banks feature in the world’s largest banks.  To ensure India has a considerable number of banks in the world map, consolidation of nationalised banks is important.  This will improve both efficiency and ranking of Indian banks.  Having 27 nationalized banks and over 3000 private and cooperative banks is way too fragmented for a country like India.

Another major problem for India is the telecom industry.  There are no set rules and it seems that rules are framed for just one group (rather 2 after the split).  Rules have to be such that there is healthy competition.  Another problem is the functioning of MTNL and BSNL.  It makes very little sense to have one operator in 2 circles while the remaining telecom circles have another entity.  Schemes like VRS and reshuffling should enable merger of the two entities.  While private telecom players have moved to third party managed infrastructure which enables them to optimise their services, BSNL is still stuck with old methods.  One of the major reasons for BSNL’s failure is its inability to award tenders for expansion.  Since it is not efficiently managed, fixed number of lines is laid beyond which tenders have to be floated.  A PSU telecom company can take the country to the next level of telecom revolution but in India, BSNL is trying to survive its evolution.  Even the SIM cards used in phones cannot be produced in India which can pose a huge security threat in the future.  Such is the shoddy infrastructure for a sector I love and belong to.

These are just some of the things that are in the planning but not implemented by subsequent governments.  There is an Indian version about the ants and grasshoppers story (http://goo.gl/xLqG9y).  If the government does not plan well it is not far that the story will turn into reality.  The sardars and rulers in Delhi need to do something before it is too late.

An Open Letter to PM Dr. Manmohan Singh!!

Dear Mr. PM,

First, I am very sorry for being a week late in giving my reactions on your speech last week.  But if you as the PM of India could make a speech after a near 5 year delay, I'm way better.  But I would not compare myself with you and so I apologise for the delay.  I waited eagerly for your speech to hear something new and different given the drubbing in 4 states (in one you had to eat the humble pie) and the Lok Sabha elections are just months away.  But alas. Forget the usual self, you gave yourself clean chit in the multi billion dollar scams.  What a shame!

You started with a positive outlook for the Indian economy and the country as a whole and reasoning that the initiatives taken earlier will now bear fruit.  Let me first remind you that you had famously said in 2009 that the inflation would be brought down in 100 days if your government came into power.  That promise still remains unfulfilled and you show us dreams of a better future.  Moving further, you outlined your government's contribution for the betterment of rural areas by introducing schemes like the MNREGA and increase in wages for rural India and a record output.  But despite such huge output, the cost keeps increasing every year and the 'mango' people literally cry when onions skyrocket and the Agriculture Minister does nothing except filling his coffers. Even though you say that the per capita income has increased and there has been a drastic reduction in BPL people, the real picture is a huge deviation from the numbers.  And when Dr. Montek Singh announces ₹ 27-₹ 32 per day as the poverty level, it is bound to make your picture rosy.  And while poverty has reduced, there is huge disparity.  Some people have so much money that they can free their son in the hit and run case while others don't get meals even once a day.  

The 9% growth rate you talked about was the after-effect of the policies of the previous government.  UPA-1s policies were disastrous and are reflected during the ruling of UPA-2 (For reference http://bit.ly/1aNZR5L and http://bit.ly/1gpXlXe). By your own admission NDA's 6 years had more kms of highways built than your 9 year rule. The only good part of the speech came when you highlighted the Sarva Shikshan Abhiyaan giving importance to education of the girl child.  And then came the confession of not creating enough jobs in manufacturing - one of the many reasons why India cannot even dream of matching China.

As if this was not enough came a blunder from a renowned economist - that high inflation is a concern but it has been offset by the increase in wages faster than inflation.  Forget an economist, even my sister who hardly understands finance or economics would not dare to make such a statement.  It seems all your intellect has gone in holding onto the PM's chair as you yourself consider this as an achievement.  The Food Security Bill which is considered your government's pet project has worsened the finances of the country and it will be a painful task for the next government irrespective of the party to repair it.  While your statements about implementing policies, faith in people are not new, they are too late as elections are near and you have sensed the people's mood.  People want real development and not subsidies, merit based systems and not quota systems which you have misread.

Now other famed statements which you made.  I may sound like supporting Narendra Modi but as the PM calling the PM nominee of the opposition who enjoys the support of India Inc. and is high in public ratings is a political sin.  You have disrespected the people's verdict and is the worst political mistake according to me. If being remote controlled by Sonia Gandhi was not enough, you went ahead and praised Rahul Gandhi and called him excellent to be the next PM.  I would like to ask you what has he done to prove himself.  Eating at farmer's home or citing Jupiter's escape velocity(please ask ISRO to issue a statement explaining this as most could not understand) for upliftment of poor does not make him excellent.  Secretly even you would accept this.

The 9 year UPA rule had many opportunities to take India on the development path.  But it reversed the cycle.  There has been record agricultural output but no proper storage facilities.  Airlines is now Naresh Goyal and Etihad's monopoly.  Oil and Gas is Reliance's monopoly and no action is taken when output drops to historical lows.  Environment for business is gloomy with honest businessmen like KM Birla named in scams and investors are scared with retrospective taxes and red tape.  CAD is ballooning and investments dwindling.  And then you have the scams which I took 2 minutes just to confirm the amount of 0's in the figure released.  And they keep getting bigger.  Lalu Prasad was convicted for a fodder scam which was valued at ₹ 900 crore by the CBI.  But then came the 2G scam, Coalgate, CWG and the list is endless.  Yet nothing is done and you say that people have forgiven you by electing you again in 2009.  It seems that an intelligent octogenarian has lost all his intellect.

It is said that Sardars are the first people to die for the country.  But you have been just the opposite.  You have been a mute sardar in this circus called UPA.  Forget asardar, you don't even come near to being "a sardar".  I don't like parties but love individuals, including you, for their intellect.  But now you compel me to drop you from the list.  By announcing the retirement, you were again late by 5 years and as they say it is 'too little, too late'.  To give you some credit I'd say "its never to late to do something good.' Hope the remaining 4 months you undo some damage done.

With a painful heart,
India's mango person.

Tata- The finest entrepreneur India has produced!!

Being a finance enthusiast and now that I am pursuing my Masters in Business Administration, reading about the corporate world is but natural.  Reading pink papers gave me more thrill than going through sports other than cricket since a very young age.  Even though I consider the Ambanis as my favourite, one of the captains of India Inc who I consider in high regards is Ratan Tata who completes 76 today.  Its been 1 year since he demitted office from Bombay House but he is heard more than his successor.  Some reports even suggest that he has been working even harder on his personal interests now that he no longer has to run the array of companies under the Tata fold.

Born on the same day as Dhirubhai Ambani, the two people are by far the best to take the country on the global business map.  But their working styles were poles apart.  While Dhirubhai Ambani was an excellent "environment manager", Tata played with utmost honesty even if it meant losing an opportunity.  The opportunity loss was huge when he refused to bribe the Aviation Minister to enter in the late 90s.  But then aviation was in his blood.  He co-piloted a Boeing fighter a couple of years ago and now has piloted not one but two JVs to start an LCC with Air Asia and a full service carrier with Singapore Airlines.  Both are expected to create ripples in the industry with their arrival.  Its sheer conviction that distinguishes him from the rest.

Having studied architecture with structural engineering and later at Harvard he had all the ingredients to make a successful entrepreneur.  The Tata group had sales of roughly $5bn in 1991 when he became chairman and India was just freeing from the shackles of licence raj.  What more would a CMD want? He had loads of cash for expansion and the timing couldn't be right.  But he had to go through an ugly spat with the mighty Russi Mody.  In his fight he showed that though he was silent and not the original choice he would have the last word.  In his quest to unify the loosely bound Tata group and change its image from a construction and truck company to a conglomerate he also lost Ajit Kerkar and Darbari Seth.  But he was not the one to give into others wishes.  He had a vision for the group and he achieved it.  It was his dream to expand into telecom and others.  Immediately after assuming the chairmanship he cut costs, introduced VRS and turned around Telco.  He was an expert at it.

By his own admission he loves cars.  And there have been a number of instances when it has been displayed. The Indica was his creation and so was Nano.  While the former was a success, the second failed.  But even then he did not shy away from accepting the mistake of marketing Nano wrongly.  He always thought for the greater good of the people which led to creation of products like Nano and the Swach purifier.  It is this selfless thinking that makes him such an admirable person the world over.  His decisions are more from gut and less from business sense.  He takes decisions and then makes them right as he puts it.

It was his ambition to grow the Tata group and for that he did not rely on organic growth alone.  He took some bold decisions for inorganic growth.  The Tetley, JLR, Corus acquisitions are fine examples while the failed bid to buy Orient Express hotels shows his hunger for growth.  Though criticized for overpaying for his acquisitions, he proved each one wrong. The JLR contributes all the profit for the parent Tata Motors at present.

But more than his business decisions, it is his personality that charms people including me.  He is a very humble man.  And that is one thing that sets him apart.  I still remember the gestures after the Taj attack.  He didn't wait for the government to take action post the rescue operation.  The same can be said about his refusal to ship a single Sumo to Pakistan.  After all the nation comes first for him. No other businessman at his level would do that.  He was driven more by values and less by profits.  A colleague at Reliance who formerly worked with Tata motors often told stories about how he used to visit the factory workshop and interact with all the employees to boost their morale.  Such was his persona.  I have not heard any CMD do that.  Even the otherwise angry Raj Thackeray spared him of speaking Marathi when he launched an attack on businessmen saying they should speak Marathi in Maharashtra.  And his response on being asked about Ratan Tata was " Please don't drag Ratan Tata into this. He is a global man and above all this". Only Ratan Tata could have charmed Raj Thackeray so much.

He never resorted to manipulations and managing the people in Delhi.  He was given unequal treatment while applying for dual technology in Telecom and even today in spite of being the first applicant has not received GSM spectrum for Delhi.  But that has not deterred him and bribe still remains a big NO.  Such values formed the base of the group he headed for 21 years and which has a history of more than a century.  Very few conglomerates survive for so long without values and a strong tradition like Tata.

At present, he is a part of PM council on  trade and industry and Carnegie Endowment for International peace apart from being the chairman of Tata trusts which is the major stakeholder of Tata Sons, the holding company of Tata companies, and has his own venture, RNT Associates.  He is deeply involved in philanthropy and loves playing golf.  But given the amount of work he has and being most sought after for his experience and his nature to help anyone I assume he might not have the time to play his favourite sport. And so he reigns our hearts. A very happy birthday Sir!!

Vijay Mallya - "King of all times!"

December 18 has many notable birthdays to its credit.  Starting with my mother others include Steven Spielberg, Brad Pitt and our very own King of Good Times, Dr. Vijay Mallya.  He may be called the "Richard Branson" of India or the flamboyant king or "playboy and brash" but he pulls off each appearance with panache.  Be it attending Derbies at the Mahalaxmi Race Course or IPL matches he never fails to make his presence felt.  The entourage of bikini clad sexy women makes males half his age jealous and being the face on the Kingfisher Calendar is a dream for upcoming models.  Its a dream lifestyle for many people today - money, beer, women. What else can a person ask for?

Taking over the reins of the UB group at a very young age (he was 28 when his father died an untimely death) he has steered his group like very few of his age could do.  Starting with consolidating the various companies under the UB group, he expanded his group rapidly to become the number 2 beer maker in the world.  He also has a fertilizer company, Mangalore Chemicals and Fertilizers (only one in Karnataka) and a sports company which owns football teams - Mohun Bagan AC and Kingfisher East Bengal, IPL team Royal Challengers Bangalore and F1 team Force India besides the flagship United Breweries, United Spirits and now grounded Kingfisher Airlines.

All was hunky dory till 2007 when he acquired Air Deccan for two reasons - start flying abroad early (Indian rules stipulate minimum 5 years before flying abroad) and to compete with the LCCs.  Before that or even till late 2012 he was the "King of Good Times".  He has 26 exotic properties across the world, Morocco, Trump Towers in New York, Johannesberg, an island near France, the beach facing Kingfisher Villa in Goa (which coincidentally bear the same initials on the entrance as mine "VM".), the residential Kingfisher Towers in Bangalore and a stud farm as well.  I forgot to mention two world-class yachts where the best parties happen and are a delight for the coveted guest list.  He has on more than one occasion done India proud by getting the Tipu Sultan sword and Gandhi's artefacts from the auctions abroad saving the face for the Indian government in the latter case.  It was a lifestyle envied by most contemporaries.

He expanded his liquor portfolio through the inorganic route by buying iconic brands like Whyte and Mackay and Bouvet Ladubay and had 22 other brands selling more than a million cases.  One of the reasons why Vijay Mallya lived such a lifestyle can be attributed to the fact that he was the brand ambassador of the group, of Kingfisher.  "Vijay Mallya was Kingfisher and Kingfisher was Vijay Mallya."  With strict rules on advertising for liquor he decided to use aviation to promote the brand after water, parties etc.  But this is by far the worst move he has made (it looks so at present but life is full of surprises).  

It was his ambition to be the "King of skies" and made an effort to buy out Air Sahara. But he did not succeed as the controversial aviation 'raja' Naresh Goyal snapped it.  This event made his CFO and long time friend Ravi Nendugadi heave a sigh of relief as he had always opposed going into aviation. It was justified given that aviation had losses with just 1-2% margins in good times while the liquor business had anything upwards of 20% margins.  Any CFO would do that.  But VM had other plans and he always had his way.  He started full service carrier Kingfisher in 2005 and offered gourmet food, TV, gorgeous air hostesses and plush seats so that it could live up to its image.  Facing competition and rising costs compelled him to buyout Air Deccan when it was up for sale in 2007. He believed there are no low cost carriers but low fare carriers but somehow lost the way when he renamed Air Deccan as Kingfisher Red which created confusion among fliers. And from here the troubles started with aviation guzzling all the cash from the liquor business and more.  

At present he has sold United Spirits to Diageo with only 11% to his name most of which is pledged, his majority stake in Mangalore Chemicals has reduced to make him third largest shareholder and faces a threat of a takeover from Deepak Fertilizers, he has had to sell half his stake in F1 Force India to Sahara group, cut down on expenditure in football teams, reports of problems at RCB IPL team and a few days ago Heineken has become the largest shareholder in United Breweries, maker of Kingfisher beer.  The once tough negotiator is finding it tough to strike a deal with banks who are selling the collateral, Airport authorities and operators slapping notices for dues and IT department not far behind, so much so that the Kingfisher house and villa are being seized by creditors and Mallya is silent with occasional statements of starting his airline again.  Employees are not paid and the blame for the airline goes on everyone from parts manufacturers to engine makers and many have filed winding-up petitions in the HC which the court has admitted.  Surely one cannot have a birthday worse than this.

But then we are talking about Vijay Mallya.  He celebrates his losses as much as his wins.  He is known to speak straight to the extent of urging IIM Ahmedabad students that ban on liquor in Gujarat should be lifted. He was criticized but hey, he means business and he was promoting it.  If such problems were to bog him down Kingfisher would have never existed or grown so much.  It was his style that has made Kingfisher what it is today.  He is the only Rajya Sabha MP to wear diamond studs and flaunt it.  Later wore designer khadi jackets.  He had the support of all political parties when he filed nominations and he is vocal about policy changes which shows his clout.  A famous article says that a 20-odd boy from USA mortgaged his Ferrari for $1500 for 15 days and later returning to claim it after paying the principal and interest.  On being asked by the banker for the reason he said no parking space was safer than the bank for so less which took all by surprise.  He was Vijay Mallya.  Don't know how true it is but only Vijay Mallya could have done this.  He trounced Anil Ambani (the famous finance whiz kid of Dhirubhai who together with brother Mukesh are known to be expert environment managers) who had equal interest in buying Air Deccan.  

Such times are not new for him and if I am not wrong a party would be ready for his guests tonight and the New Year in Goa.  And he might be working on reviving his pet project, Kingfisher Airlines, which he micromanaged.  One famous saying from Vijay Mallya himself is " I am a businessman and my business is up for sale if I get the right price".  Time that he let go Kingfisher Airlines to save his liquor business.  He was King of Good Times prior to 2012 and now is the King of Bad Times.  Surely God had a glass of beer or whisky while writing his destiny and so I rightly call him "King of All Times". Happy birthday Vijay Mallya. Hiccup!!

Mahatma's India developing - Really?

Today being the birthday of the man, Mahatma Gandhi, who people claim to be responsible (undermining contribution of various others like Bose, Sardar Patel and even Shastri who shares his birthday with the Mahatma) for today's Independent India, lets try to see where India of his dreams is at present.  Is it really growing as suggested by the sugar-coated figures or is it in utter shit!!  Does India really make use of its resources ( both natural and human intellect) or is it only used to fill the coffers of some people at the mercy of common taxpayers?

Never known to be good in academics, these mind boggling growth estimates and high deficits make little sense to me. Not because I doubt its authenticity - I have no case to doubt it but because for the world India maybe growing and will be among the top-3 by the end of next decade but for an ordinary Indian (or as Naseeruddin Shah puts it, the stupid common man ) its nothing more than tears.  The Aam Aadmi - I hope Arvind Kejriwal likes this - is suffering and crying (read high onion prices) and the rulers of India, the very same people elected by the people for their well-being, are laughing their way to the Swiss Banks.  When someone like Ashok Khemka talks against the "National Daamad" he is transferred or when Ms. Durga rightfully orders demolition of an illegal wall, the mafias boast of a "41-minute suspension act" and the reason by the much hyped CM is that it would have caused communal disharmony.  So much for minority politics eh?  The government is so skeptical of such mafias that it mooted an ordinance for safeguarding tainted politicians against criminal cases in the backdrop of an averse Supreme Court order.  It took an immature prince to go against it and order temporary withdrawal and for the first time he receives some pat.

While I would not be commenting much about the pre-2000, the past decade and half have been painful if not worse.  And a single party cannot be blamed.  Each and every party is responsible for the mess and the condition that has led to us being ranked only 2nd to Russia in major nations in terms of corruption.  The BJP led government tweaked rules for a big corporate house only to provide mobile licenses from fixed line licenses.  Rumors doing the rounds were that the then telecom minister received millions of shares at just ₹ 1. Is that democracy or capitalism?  Since then the number of scams have been more than the number of clothes girls purchase ( no offence please, it is your birthright to buy clothes in abundance).  From the 2G scam to the Coal scam, from the brazen loot from Air India ( one of the better airlines by personal experience) by a certain Gujju minister to the CWG scam the figures have been astounding.  It would take double or maybe triple checks even for a CA who deals with numbers day in and day out before writing the actual figures in rupees.  Even the defence forces and the ISRO are not spared by people at the helm.  And the last two are considered to be of utmost importance for any country.

So in spite of having natural resources in abundance we are suffering.  Oh! talking of natural resources, the illegal iron ore mining in various states to benefit a few companies also should be counted.  Corruption is high and so is security of the stupid people and women in particular.  Rapes are a common thing now and the police seem to have no clue to stop it.  So the blame shifts to the dressing habits of women and as Kalki Koechlin puts it " Its the women's fault" after all.  A country like India where the police force knows about each and every small happening and at their will solve cases within hours cannot ensure the security of it people - hard to believe right?  All this because our beloved politicians want control of each and everything, from natural resources to cash to the police force.

To add to the woes, no single party has a majority at the Centre to form policies.  One or the other coalition partners will threaten to withdraw support if their demands are not met.  And the ego each of these partners carry is phenomenal.  The cow belt region parties don't see eye to eye yet support the same coalition at the centre.  In such a case how can they come to a consensus on an issue.  And those that no longer matter like Lalu Prasad or P.V.  Narsimha Rao are later chased by past cases and ensured that they don't rise in politics to threaten the ruling government.  And yes, the CBI is used effectively for this purpose.  Wasn't CBI involved to ensure safety in the country?  Well, the CBI might now say that it stays true to its name - Central Bureau of Investigation - it investigates for the central government in any case, just the purpose being different.

And before I forget, politicians have ensured India never rises in sports.  A country having the second largest population rejoices on winning a single Gold in the Olympics - Sad.  Or be it the case of BCCI ( Board of Corrupt and Careless Indians or Intellectuals if you like) which is the richest board and has politicians and corporate bigwigs to loot the money.  By the way it is a not-for-profit organisation and does not pay taxes or come under the ambit of the RTI.

Finally before I close, going back to the second resource I talked about in the opening paragraph - Human intellect.  While NRIs and Indian origin people are at the helm of some prestigious organisations across the globe very few actually come back to India.  Even those few are not welcome by our rulers (read Arcelor Mittal).  And each year thousands of students go abroad for Masters.  Can't we have institutes of world fame and people from various countries come to our country and not the other way round?  Common sense tells me it would result in huge capital inflows as well.  But are politicians are busy looting people by charging hundreds of thousands for primary education and doing nothing for higher education.  And yes, they are name obsessed too.  So it is very common to find names of politicians with no meaningful contribution to development of country as institute names.

Final nail in the coffin is the reservation system.  It is a sin to be a general category engineering student like me.  And by criticizing reservation, I would like to clear myself before some local policeman comes with an arrest warrant after me ( well even that won't be produced as it would be entirely illegal to arrest me for practising freedom of speech) that reservation of such proportions where the intended beneficiaries still don't benefit is a waste.  The intention was to uplift the backward and downtrodden and change their psyche.  But after 66 years of no result it needs serious rethinking.  And if not I bet one of our aged politicians (they still claim to be young) to be treated by a doctor who has taken years to complete his MBBS but got admission only because of reservation.

All this has taken a toll on the energetic yet restless youth and when they are asked about a country of preference its a country except India.  This should be the final blow to India I suppose.  Effectively these politicians are killing the golden egg giving hen themselves.

Under this scenario we are going to elections in less than a year and the candidates being a Prince not interested in the job and another though worthy but yet to be tested at the national level.  Though Narendra Modi is officially the hate-boy of Indian politics, people forget that Godhra was not the only riot in India.  There have been bigger and nastier riots under other governments as well.  But even Narendra Modi has refrained from spelling out his vision for India which is something I don't like of late about him.  He still remains the "best among the worst" to lead the country and probably the only hope left.

So while the resting Mahatma might be regretting that his country is ruled by his three monkeys rolled into one and ruled by three masters, there is no clear picture about India.  Just hope that India really taps its potential and grows to be in the top-3 countries in the world but at the same time ensures the well being of its "stupid common man".

India's favorite word since independence - "Jugaad"!!

Ah! finally some free time after a hectic fortnight (actually 2 months).. Sipping tea after 4 days of 3 hr sleep ( a rarity in my life) I wish each reader a very very Happy Independence Day.. Jai Hind!!

The day started with reading the transcript of the same boring "Theek Hai" speech by Dr. Manmohan Singh drawing a rosy picture of India for the 10th time in a row but Narendra Modi's impromptu made up for the dullness in the former.  While each year since 2008 the PM makes a speech spelling out hope and boom it has always been the opposite.  Social Networking sites have left no stone unturned to make a mockery of the PM and his false speech even going to the extent of the problems that should be addressed and ways and means to solve them.  

Today I will not speak on the age old topics of corruption, mismanagement by the Government, bowing to coalition pressure and "saas/sasur-damaad sagas"(Read: Sonia G and Robert 'Banana' Vadra and Srini-Meiyappan) taking India back to pre-1991 days ( it has in fact become worse in my opinion) but one word that has become the favorite of all Indians - JUGAAD.  Though it was not heard frequently 15 years ago, the frequency has increased exponentially with each passing day.  Each and every sentence related to work involves the word "Jugaad".  Well for people not well versed with the Hindi term, Jugaad means "getting work done mostly by bypassing the procedure".  Students during exams say "koi jugaad kar lenge" while when you go to a government office you happily tell the concerned person "sir koi to jugaad hoga, sab khush rahenge".  Even corporates have not stopped from using this Jugaad and get all their proposals passed by hook or by crook.  Well in some situations it is absolutely fine to bypass the protocol and get what you want but it is alarming when you find for ways and means to use jugaad for every damn thing.  And the best way to do this is find connections higher in the hierarchy and just bribe him or form such good relations that you have it your way.  Nothing bad to have connections.  It can be looked as a means for networking and as I have learnt in my MBA course, 48% of successful managers rated networking as the highest among other traits of a good manager.  But then to use shortcuts for everything is simply not accepted.  And from this attitude of ours corruption and other problems follow.  Add to this, we take pride in saying that we are the best "Jugaadus" and can do anything. This makes me feel sorry about our future.  

If we don't follow procedures and just use shortcuts it will lead us to nowhere.  And if the final outcome is itself going to be decided on that basis why have rules at all.. For example while coming up with the guidelines for banking licenses RBI came up with a number of guidelines to be adhered to.  But we all know that one group will bag a license in all probabilities by using its power in the government circles.  So all the hard work that other interested groups do will go in vain.  Rather why not declare that one company is sure and there are 'x' number of other companies.  That will bring some transparency.  

It is still not dangerous but in future when our future generations right from the time they are born start practising this it will lead to great problems.  Only the rich will prosper while the poor will die bribing the ever unsatisfied babus, having connections up the hierarchy will be another style statement ( not that it is now) and whatever little honesty is left will either die or migrate abroad and contribute in their already good state. Rules are made so that there is a level playing field and it is in the interest of all parties involved.  It is fun to break them once or twice but making it a habit spells doom for us.  It is better to have complete knowledge of what we do which not only enhances our knowledge but also gives us satisfaction.

This can go on and on but being in MBA I am taught to manage time especially when I have my exams in 5 days.  So lets hope to go on the right path and do less of Jugaad.. Else time is not far when the most famed son-in-law would be proved right about our country -  turning into a "Banana Republic" with no rules but only Jugaad.. Happy Independence Day again.. Vande Mataram!!

The Week That Wasn't- Sunday's main refreshment on TV

When The Week That Wasn't (TWTW as they say) celebrated 300 episodes with Boman Irani as the host I had just started blogging.  I have always loved the show and wanted to express it in the form of a blog.  Well, what I couldn't do last year, I'm doing it now.  As the show completes 350 episodes - Gopal, Kaneez and Kunal might be refuting by now - it has been a hilarious journey so far. Making people laugh is no easy job.  And when tears come out in others because of your humor you deserve a great applause.  That's what the team at TWTW deserves.  Not only is the script good but also the characters assigned to all are played to perfection.

Each week Cyrus "Bharucha", Kaneez "Rani Pasand", Kunal "the Foodie" and Gopal the you-say-and-he-will portray guy and Mohit mimic the past week events greatly.  Their presence itself makes you laugh and once they start acting its a laughter riot.  Even though the disclaimer says that it is all fictitious, they bring out the facts known to people effectively.  For example when the ministers in UPA were asked to declare their assets, Sharad Pawar declared ₹ 12 crore.  To this Cyrus said that Pawar thought it was the amount in his wallet.  There are a numerous other jokes on Pawar like he can buy all of Pakistan, Bangladesh and so on.  But it is not limited to him alone.  Politicians across parties are mocked and exposed through their strikingly similar associates mostly played by Kunal.  This is what makes it even more special.  There is no bias unlike some other channels or shows on the channel itself.  Now coming to each person's role:

Cyrus Broacha:
The man who leads from the front.  Apart from anchoring with panache, he is also the script writer as per the credits ( Guess he must have paid for that :P).  Numerous jokes on his wife, singing as the Afghan guy after Osama was killed, mocking Kris Srikant or the dancer in the bar he plays each role to perfection ( I'm as serious as Cyrus is on the show :P).  Other notable performances are the doctor treating Baba Ramdev or even the guy caught in sting operations.  But the best part is the interview with the people involved themselves where their expressions and sentences are used for questions which make you laugh your guts out.  He is a delight to be watched.

Kunal Vijaykar:
Easily the backbone of the show. He co-writes the script and he can portray any and every role to perfection.  His physique resembles that to all politicians and he just uses it too well.  Be it Mayavati's assistant Kalwati, Jayalalitha's accomplice, the Mumbai Pandu, Jitin Matkari ( my personal favourite ) and oh boy he sings so well.  He also portrays almost all females like Usha Uthuppa, Pratibha Patil's assistant et al.  He knows how to tickle the funny bones of the audience.  Kudos to him!

Gopal:
Gopal is fantastic when it comes to acting.  Be it the singer with Meira Kumar, the politician, the Maoist in the train looting it, the detective called Rahul Gandhi and you name it.  But the best part is where he plays Manmohan Singh.  Perfect portrayal of the learned Sardar.  Another sardar is Cherry Paaji saying "Guru'. My favourite of Gopal.  You cannot miss him and he makes sure that you don't stop laughing.  One of the many performances I remember is where he played Anna Hazare shouting "Uposhan karunga".  It was simply fabulous.

Kaneez:
The only female in the show (well second if we consider Kunal's female avatars) she plays the role assigned quite brilliantly.  I love her as Sonia Gandhi and Meira Kumar where she shouts "Baith Jaiye" in her accent.  She usually plays the reporter or the blonde or even the weather specialist.  But each Friday when the film releases she plays film critic Rani Pasand with elan.  That is my favorite character when it comes to Kaneez.  All in all a great performer and love to watch her acting as the elite class of SoBo not aware of reality.

Mohit:
Though Mohit is not prominent in each show, his act as a subordinate neta or the hawaldar are humourous.
And he is the associate producer.  So thank him for making this show possible even though as Cyrus claims they are not paid or paid in peanuts.

Had it not been for the Sunday morning or the repeat in evening it would have been quite a boring day given that family dramas and films rule most of Sunday on TV.  I have missed a number of roles played by these guys because this space is just not enough to describe them.  But I hope they complete 3500 episodes and even more.  Though Cyrus will become old given he is already in his nineties (still considered to be young in BJP) I will always look forward to watch this show.  It truly describes "The Week That Wasn't".